I am having a really bad day. I drove three hours back to London yesterday after seeing my father in his hospital bed for 15 minutes. He was not at all well. Feeling really sick – which the nurse said was not abnormal after such a big operation. There was no point in us staying, he didn’t want us there. He couldn’t concentrate. It’s awful seeing somebody you love in pain. It makes me feel helpless and hopeless.
I have texted him every day since his operation and he’s always called me straight afterwards. Today he hasn’t. Which means that he’s still feeling awful. Which worries me hugely.
I’m really worried about my mother too. She doesn’t cope very well without him. They’ve been married for 45 years and have seldom been apart. Seeing her trying to be strong is breaking my heart. She’s due to have an operation in a month because she can barely walk – she needs a second, 8 hours of surgery to restructure her spine from both the front and the back.
This is the downside of having somebody you love by your side for nearly the whole of your life. Of having found a soulmate to share your life with.
She barely knows how to breathe without him.
September 6th, 2009 at 11:37 am
aw lulu… sorry. so sorry. sending LARGE bear hugs to you all… xxx j
September 6th, 2009 at 11:40 am
I just wanted you to know that we are praying for you and your family
September 6th, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Im sorry to hear about both your folks….they have been together all their lives and dont know how to breathe without each other…
hope all is better very soon for you all….
September 6th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
Lulu, so sorry to hear today has been such a bad day but you know that when people have been so ill there are bound to be days like this, its just one day let it pass. Tomorrow hopefully will be much better. The difficulty we have in these circumstances is the desire to 'make it better' and the knowledge that for once this is something we are unable to do.
Take heart
September 6th, 2009 at 5:45 pm
Keep breathing. One hour at a time. One day at a time. In a few days your dad will begin to get more control over the pain and things will begin to seem less …free fall. I am sorry to hear your Mum needs surgery now too. That is going to be very hard right now.
Hang on in there and please allow yourself a break now and then. they need you strong. (And i need you for Sauvingon Blanc as soon as this all steadies up!)
T xxx
September 6th, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Big hugs, Di xx
September 7th, 2009 at 5:34 am
Gosh. I'm so sorry. Awful time for you all… what to say, without sounding trite. Take it one day at a time? Chin up? Keep smiling? Really hope that your Dad feels better very soon … x
September 7th, 2009 at 8:38 am
Having had a mum going through cancer v recently I know just what you mean. As everyone else says just keep breathing and keep going, one step in front of the other. There isn't anything I can say to make you feel any better, but I hope you take some comfort from the knowledge that we are all sending love and hugs.
xx
September 8th, 2009 at 11:03 am
Gosh you managed to make me cry with your last line. Take care Lulu and I hope your Dad starts to feel better soon. Claire x