According to my youngest son’s trumpet teacher he has dyslexia. Diagnosed because he struggles with learning the notes. Personally I think it’s more a question of CBA* to learn the notes, but I couldn’t risk ignoring his diagnosis because I suspect that music teachers probably can tell a huge amount about a child by the way they learn. So. I have had to talk to the teachers at his school, who have said they would be surprised if that was the case because he can read and write, but they will do a brief initial test and if after that I am still concerned I will have to pay a fortune to an external educational psychologist for a full report.
Because I wasn’t sure whether a full report was a good idea/investment and whether labelling a child helps or not I spoke to another teacher who knows him well. She said “he definitely doesn’t have dyslexia, but I think you should get him tested for Attention Deficit Disorder, I am quite sure he has issues with concentration and short term memory”. THEN she said “there is usually obsessive, compulsive tendencies which might suggest his obsession with food and therefore you will need to be careful for the future because those children with food obsessions quite often are the ones who move on to have serious drink and drug problems”.
Great. So now, I don’t think there is any point in bothering with secondary school options, I might as well just book him a place directly into The Priory for when he’s 15.
EVERYBODY agrees that he is the most gorgeous, engaging, gentle, kind child, “I mean he has SO much more emotional intelligence than my teenage son – who basically has none”, I told her – to which she replied, “you mean that he’s just an average bloke then?”. She thinks he’s going to be a hairdresser.
Funny really, what people say to you about your children. If he was my firstborn I’d be freaking out by now. From experience (and exhaustion) I know that I need to take all the above advice with a seriously large pinch of salt (or glass of wine).
*CBA – Can’t Be Arsed
February 26th, 2010 at 5:22 pm
Many people thought my little sister was dyslexic – she isn’t but they though she was because she struggled with spelling and reading, whereas I had no problems. Many develop at their own rate.. some children will be further behind than others at different points in their development (which is why its a terrible idea for any children under 11 to do exams and tests!). You also have to remember the home situation with a separated family can take several years for anyone to adjust to. Don’t worry about it I’m sure he’s fine and they’re just scaremongering. x
February 26th, 2010 at 5:30 pm
I know. I feel bad for him because not only has he got to deal with a complicated family situation but he is a summer born child which makes him nearly the youngest in the year which is really rubbish for boys. Lx
February 26th, 2010 at 5:32 pm
I think the large glass of wine sounds like a good idea – much tastier than a pinch of salt. People do say the strangest things sometimes…
February 27th, 2010 at 4:50 am
Bloody teachers. Let’s just toss a small bomb into this mum’s life and let her get on with it. I will never forget one particular woman whose main comment in one report of my daughter (brilliant at everything and sweet with it) “Talent has deserted Kerry in the Art Room”. She went on to get a GCSE in pottery.
Pinch of salt, plus wine to take the taste away.
February 27th, 2010 at 6:25 pm
Could be much simpler still. When I was having problems playing the right notes, it turned out I needed glasses!
PS Sounds like a great kid to me.
February 27th, 2010 at 7:28 pm
The quality of advice you are being given is poor. A trumpet teacher suggesting dyslexia? A teacher who links ADHD with OCD obsessive compulsive disorder?
Is he frustrated with his difficulties learning the trumpet? Maybe he isn’t all that interested and doesn’t value the goal enough to put in the effort required .
You seem to have good instincts. A talk with your son should would probably uncover what problems exist if any. I was an excellent student without any problems ( except being tone deaf) and so never enjoyed learning to play the oboe and dropped it without ever learning to play it well. I am sure glad my lack of interest was never thought to be dyslexia or ADD that needed help and extended my short and unwanted music experience.
February 28th, 2010 at 7:30 pm
He may not have dyslexia but there are other learning disabilities that can affect specific subjects. For example, one of my children has dyscalcula which affects maths and spelling really badly; the other has a recall problem which affects maths and languages. There is an excellent Dyslexia Unit in Kent (I think) with a web site explaining lots of this.
I wouldn’t panic about it but I wouldn’t write it off either as it could impact other subjects. (And yes, have his eyes tested too.)
May 12th, 2010 at 10:20 am
alot of info. thanks m8!
May 15th, 2010 at 2:09 pm
nice. this blog is getting updates?
July 19th, 2010 at 3:41 am
dyslexia is not that debiliating but it is somewhat limiting to the kind of job that you can get,*;