Family Affairs

Bloody hell. It’s all happening here. Daughter is doing exams she’s still revising for in the car on the way to school, teenage son needing Dr’s appointments for a damaged rotator cuff, youngest son doing a football tournament this afternoon, in need of an eye test, a dyslexia test and a pair of flares and a 70’s wig for his assembly tomorrow. He’s got Arts Week at school and they are looking closely at London in the 1970’s. Depressingly, he brought back a note saying “Your parents should be a great source of knowledge” and then he proceeded to ask me various questions in manner of interviewer questioning a First World War veteran.  In addition,  my doctor brother rang to say that having spoken to his oncologist, my father’s scan results showed no cancer lurking around at the moment.  VG news.

Tomorrow night is the charity event I have been a committee member for. Anna Valentine is showing her new collection and all the money raised from the auction and donations are going towards Maggie’s Cancer Care centres which I have written about before. Anna and I used to live together and she started sewing in my sitting room so we’ve been friends now for 20 years. She made my wedding dress and then went on to make Camilla Parker Bowles’ wedding dress many years later. She’s incredibly talented and very successful now AND she’s letting me wear one of her dresses for the event. I’m a bit worried about that. I’ll probably get ketchup down it or something. Check out her stuff. It’s amazing:- Anna Valentine

The event is going to be wonderful. The tickets have all sold out and the guest list is UBER impressive. Everybody I’ve spoken to has been hugely supportive in providing things for the evening – and there are going to be so many people to thank: “One Water” have very generously given their bottles of water and Rococo Chocolates are providing delicious chocolates at a vastly reduced price. Chanel have provided the make-up, Zil Pasyon have offered the most amazing holiday ever, my friend who owns Bananagrams has made a big donation, my yoga teacher friend is offering free one-to-one classes, my friend at First News has offered a work experience placement and lots of other people are giving their time or products for free. Hopefully I’m going to be able to show you lots of pictures of the event on Friday.

During the class I taught this morning I managed to get cramp. Not a good look when the bloody instructor is rolling around the floor in agony, so I didn’t do that, I just carried on as if nothing had happened, but I must have looked ridiculous. Whilst stretching out our feet I had to keep tucking my toes underneath me otherwise every time I pointed them they got stuck in a weird position and the difficulty of that, when you’re at the front of the room is that all the clients copy your every move. It was quite funny watching them trying to put their toes into spasmy positions.

Finally, amongst all the busyness of life, I am feeling very bad for Builder Bloke. I saw him last night for a quick drink. He was very insistent that I should meet him face to face. He had something to tell me. What he told me was that he wanted to try again, that we were meant to be together, that we had a magical connection and that he couldn’t live without me. HOW CAN BREAKING UP WITH SOMEONE AT MY AGE BE SO BLOODY HARD? Millions of people must be having to go through similar situations, having been forced back out into the dating world after years of monogamy.  You’d think we could all be a little less emotional and a little more resigned as we get older, but I felt like a 16 year old again and the reality is that being in a relationship in your middle years can be fraught with difficulty. I had to be very, very blunt, because he has consistently refused to take “no” for an answer. I felt horrible. I know I have said the same thing to him for what seems like a year now, but it clearly hadn’t sunk in at all. I think this time, I finally got through to him because I told him that I’ve been seeing quite a lot of someone else. Someone who I’ve known for a long time, who has a far more healthy, everybody-should-get-on-with-everybody-else-type approach to life, who seems keen to ensure that I get some sense of calm in my life after all the stress of last year. He was gutted, but it was the only way I could make him accept that it was over – it’s a territorial thing I guess. He sent me several texts in the middle of the night one was actually quite unpleasant and unrepeatable and the other simply said “tonight I died”. Which whilst dreadfully sad is frankly a little over dramatic. I know it gets harder to meet the right person as you get older and I’m really, really sorry he feels like that but I feel differently and there is nothing he can do about that.

I’m really, really too old for this sort of thing.