Experts have shared top Christmas tips for divorced and separated parents whose children will be spending Christmas day with their ex-partners. They recommend that parents need to put on a brave face for the sake of the children but “not to be afraid to cry on their own – or […]
Posted by Family Affairs on 12-12-2014 in BLOG / DIVORCE tagged with Children / Christmas / DIVORCE / parents / separation / top tips Posted by Family Affairs on 13-12-2013 in BLOG tagged with advice / Age UK / campaign / cold / top tips / warm Posted by Family Affairs on 28-10-2013 in TRAVEL tagged with flights / jet lag / tiredness / top tips / travelling Posted by Family Affairs on 11-04-2011 in BLOG tagged with Children / revision / top tips / tutors
OK – well for a start I really don’t have any top tips on how to make your children revise because I genuinely believe that unless they really want to do it themselves then you haven’t got a hope in hell of cramming anything into their heads. Yes you can provide the right environment, feed and water them and buy them colour co-ordinated files, but thats about it.
Or you could throw money at the problem and/or threaten them with all manner of scary approach. For example:
1. REVISION COURSES
I have just spent a fortune on a 3 day course for my teen son who felt he needed to understand “Mechanics” a bit better before his exam. It did briefly cross my mind that I wasn’t aware he was training to be a mechanic before he quietly explained that Mechanics was a large part of Maths A Level and very difficult to understand.
These sort of crash courses work quite well (I hope)
Private tutors cost a fortune but are another good way to avoid arguments and public humiliation by trying to teach the same thing yourself. They prefer a neutral person anyway. Would concentrate more and it is often worth the investment. My youngest had one for a while. Totally hated it but went anyway. I think it probably helped hugely with him passing his entrance exam.
3. HOME SCHOOLING
I have often used this as a desperate measure threat – it works every time. The thought of their mother teaching them to do anything other than bubble writing and tying their shoe laces was so abhorrent to them (note I had to look that word up for correct spelling) that it made them work MUCH harder. It hung over them like the thought of family counselling or a walk in the park with a dog that poo’s a lot.
4. BOARDING SCHOOL
Some schools offer week long revision courses or an introduction to the areas they are thinking about going – like law. I have friends whose children have hugely benefited but it is very expensive and you obviously have no control over what they do in the evenings.
5. THREATENING AND SHOUTING AND TYING THEM TO THE CHAIR
Personally I think this works well. Not the tying them to the chair bit – we won’t get away with that these days but shouting “GET ON WITH SOME BLOODY WORK” before you go out. Then it is important to go straight out so that you don’t know whether they have listened to you or not. There is no point in asking them because they will say they have whether they have or not “I’VE ALREADY DONE 3 BIOLOGY PAPERS” they will shout back at you, or ‘I’VE BEEN WORKING FOR FOUR HOURS ALREADY – BACK OFF!”
So you see? I have no answers.
Just rest assured that most of us get through it all in the end, with or without their parents involvement.
How much involvement do you think you should give as a parent?
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