I don’t even know where my children are, let alone what to buy anyone for Chirstmas.

My fault entirely for producing a child on the 21st December, which means that four days before Christmas much time and effort (and money) has to be dedicated to a birthday. My house is in total chaos, after an all night party he had here on Saturday night. I slightly wish that he was still young enough to not drink alcohol yet – or otherwise old enough to buy his own bloody drinks. It has been a full on weekend made FAR worse by the fact that on Friday I suddenly developed some mystery illness culminating in a miserable evening in a steak house for above mentioned birthday dinner where I couldn’t eat because something in my neck was so swollen that it stopped me from biting. All I could do was suck a chip.

Miserable and very painful. On Saturday night just as his party was about to kick off I had to invite myself to a friends house for a sleepover so that I could avoid all the noise. Which was a good plan BUT it meant the house was even more of a mess than I’d expected so at 9am on Sunday morning I found myself hoovering my floor for bits of glass because my brother’s two children were coming round for breakfast. Honestly the kitchen looked and smelt like a pub the morning after. Every surface sticky – you couldn’t put anything down on it without having it stick forever. Even the small children got stuck.

Owing to my strange illness, I spent all day in A & E the next day with my sister in law who was AMAZING. She dropped everything to come and help me get seen to. They had to take bloods to make sure it wasn’t anything to sinister, which meant they could rule out a number of things. Whilst I am still not right, thank goodness the antibiotics appear to have kicked in quite quickly and the unattractive swelling went down – now, the most logical conclusion is a blocked salivary gland – apparently I might have a stone – or just an infection.

Stone? What sort of stone? Asked everyone. I DON”T KNOW. How does that even happen? My friend thinks it’s far more likely to be a pip from the lemon in my gin and tonic. Really not sure. Or indeed what happens next. Have to have some further tests to see if the stone needs blowing up.

Anyway. In addition to above mentioned problem, there is the fact that my daughter left yesterday and is now on safari in Africa. That too is a problem. A MASSIVE problem – mainly because it has caused me to fret that I am a horrible person and not a proper mother who is pleased when her children get to go to interesting places and parties without me. I am not pleased, I am just jealous. I don’t think it’s at all fair that she should be there and we are here. Which is really rather sad behaviour on my part – of course in reality I am VERY pleased for her, but still….just saying’

ANYWAY must get on. TOO MUCH TO DO.


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